The following are my notes on "Building Trust with New Leadership," an event cosponsored by the Partnership for Public Service and the Federal Communicators Network that focused on helping civil servants work effectively with the new Administration. The event is availabl free for viewing on Vimeo.
As always, in attending such events and sharing information and opinions on social media, I am independent, meaning that I do not represent my agency or the federal government as a whole. These notes are public domain and may be freely reproduced and distributed.
PresenterExecutive Coach Michelle Woodward
Theme 1: Teamwork
Based On "The Five Behaviors Of A Cohesive Team" [TM] by Wiley Workplace Solutions & Patrick Lencioni
- "If you can do trust-based conflict, then we can get to commitment to the same goal. Then we can hold each other accountable without people being attacked. Once you have all that, that's when you get to results."
- Myers-Briggs personality type influences how we approach one another: Thinkers need justice, feelers need harmony.
- Aim to "build bridges, not burn bridges."
- "Appreciate the opportunity to learn where the other person is coming from."
- "Appreciate the opportunity to learn what you could have done better
- "Stick to the issue at hand."
- "Offer and accept apologies without hesitation."
- "Own an apology."
- "Be genuine."
- "Be consistent."
- "Be present in this moment not the last Administration."
- "Accept questions."
- "Give others the benefit of the doubt."
- Office Gossip/Office Politics:
- "Sometimes gossip is 'important information' but 'if I wouldn't say it to you, I wouldn't say it about you'" - differentiate between information and words that are "hurtful or mean"; mean words don't build trust.
- "You can either get enmeshed in that or step back from it."
- Keep your ears open but don't get engaged in all that hoopla."
- If there's a meeting that you should have been in - "give the benefit of the doubt" - "small corrections" - say "Hey X, that meeting is in my programmatic area, I believe I should be included in those meetings" and "9 times out of 10, X will say 'Thank you.'"
- First understand reality - "good to know" - then try to change reality (paraphrase); "when you see this is the lay of the land, step back, say 'good to know, they're showing me exactly who they are, who can be my ally'?"
- Understanding Others:
- “Find out - what motivates people?
- "Quality time"
- "Words of affirmation"
- "Take something off their plate"
- "Gift" (comment from DB: obviously “gift” here means something small and thoughtful, e.g. the speaker mentioned chocolate chip cookies; not an illegal or unethical one.)
Theme 2: Self-Management
Based On The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
"This is really on you - these four agreements are agreements you make with yourself that can help you." Paraphrased:
- Keep your word; don’t use words to say back things about yourself or gossip.
- Remember that others act because of their own perceptions and motivations, not because of you – it’s not personal.
- Don’t assume anything – ask first, communicate so that you can avoid unnecessary “misunderstandings, sadness and drama.”
- For your purposes, doing your best is the equivalent of excellence; there is no abstract high mark you always have to meet (because that is humanly impossible).
Theme 3: Managing Stress
- "Units of energy" - if you're spending 60% spun up about office politics or office gossip, can't get things done. Keep a time log.
- Breathe - breathe in the feeling you want (e.g. happiness) and out the feeling you don't want (e.g. sadness)
- Fear of the New Administration:
- Question: “I work for an agency that was in love with the last administration and is very scared and worried about the new one. How to handle?”
- Answer: “Stages of grief. You may be orbiting anger for a while, but hopefully you get to acceptance. I wouldn't rush anybody through the stages, because it's a profound change. Also don't make assumptions about who these people are or worry about what could possibly happen. Focus on right now, what's the reality, what do we know so far? If you want to be active, think about how can you effectively talk to allies about supporting the work of the office?
- Opposition/Disagreement (Related To Above Question; Coping With Negative Emotions/Reactions To Or Disagreements With The New Administration)
- "Be an activist within the rules of your organization. Overall think about how can I greet these people, see them for who they are, build trust, because wouldn't it be awesome if you could turn them around into allies.”
- "All of us need to understand what is our breaking point. What is the point at which we're not going to provide tax returns of enemies. I would recommend each of us search our own heart, and our own values and say - (what are the things about which) I can't compromise."
- "I do think you can be people of conscience and do your work well."
- Battling Perceptions:
- Question: “How do you counter the (perception that all feds are obstructionist because of the) "alt' or the "resistance,” e.g. the Twitter accounts that have been stood up, this is not like anything else we’ve seen in the past.
- Answer: “You don't want to be ‘tarnished’ that you’re ‘subverting or obstructing,’ say ‘don’t tar me with the same brush.’” But “we are in uncharted waters, this is unusual.”
- Chain of Command:
- Question: What do you do when “political appointees came in and asked for ideas” (but) “other people in the office are going to say you should've come to me first; how do you handle not violating the trust of your own people in your organization by expressing your ideas to them?” (e.g. the chain of command).
- Answer: “My thought would be, rather than going around your direct supervisor, saying to your supervisor can we go in together." Separate comment from the audience: “Not always does your leadership want these ideas to go forward.” Presenter comment: “It always comes back to you. Dn't gossip."
- Getting "Shot Down":
- Question: “What do you do when your good idea is automatically shot down?”
- Answer: “Find out what motivates them (fear, or need information) and respond directly to that.” “Say - "I've got your back" (not going to do anything to hurt you).” Audience answer: “Focus on what problem you're solving rather than how you're feeling about it.”
- Hitting A "Brick Wall":
- Question: What if you’re not getting anywhere?
- Answer: "If you feel like you're hitting a brick wall, go back to trust" and "If they're just a closed person, just say 'good to know.'"
- Dealing With People Who Just Want To Win:
- Question: What if "all they care about is 'victory?'"
- Answer: “Again, (say to yourself) ‘good to know’ then ‘what do I want’; also ask ‘How am I getting engaged here’ or ‘affected’ (by what’s going on) - you may need to ‘call a break’; if you have trust you can say, ‘is this about winning or about finding the solution?’”
- Question: “Please talk to ‘practices of exclusion’ that can ‘mess with trust’ and ‘dissemination of information’ - where ‘other groups of people know information before other groups know it.’
- Answer (from fellow audience member): “(You have) so many opportunities to advocate internally" - "they (leadership) don't know that information they share to senior management does not cascade down."
- “Marion Wright Edelman once said, ‘Be a flea on the big guy.’ Whenever there's a need to say the truth, do it."
- “Last administration the "trifecta of evil went behind closed doors and started this culture of fear" saying they were ‘evaluating projects’ - nobody wanted to reveal anything."
- "They were ‘egotistical micromanagers who ‘all had a different perception of what the agency should be doing or where we were going’ and ‘used the workforce against each other’ for ‘four years.’"
- "(Then) ‘new leadership, completely empowering’ and there was ‘hesitancy about being able to trust’ because ‘in the past the light at the end of the tunnel was an oncoming train.’ ‘Just wanted to point it out because this trust issue is really really critical."
- "Sometimes we're beating our heads against really a solid wall. (But on a) positive note - it will change. People will cycle out, it will change."
- "Convince them it was their idea and then give them credit" (semi-humorous)
- "Use a debrief from prior Administration - what was helpful to them?" (Generally they want "more involvement" from the civil service)
All opinions my own. These notes are public domain and may be freely reproduced and distributed.