I was in a meeting this morning and it seemed to go well. I think this is because we were all getting along today. Seems to me that most meetings go well or badly because of this.
Communication is love. I think about that as a parent. Sometimes I yell at my kids and they say, I can't hear you when you're yelling at me. In the past I would respond, Don't worry if I'm yelling, just do as I say. Now I know that was the wrong answer. I should have said, I'm sorry, I'll take a few minutes to calm down.
Communication is love. When you're in the Starbucks and that barista who is always rude, is rude again, you don't want to go back there. Conversely there is a Starbucks I go to, which I prefer, where the barista says hello and asks me how my low-carb diet is going. I do like to hang out there.
Communication is love. Do you know why I like to shop in Trader Joe's? Because they play music from my teenage years, the '80s. And when I hear I Ran by A Flock of Seagulls I remember laying in front of the TV on the floor and watching music videos all day. I remember Sundays, and no pressure and no errands to do. I am ecstatic.
Communication is love. I applied to the MBA program at the University of the People, which is accredited and "free." (They charge a small application fee and testing fees per class.) To which my husband said, What do you need another degree for, you have a PhD, and the girls are still in school. To which I replied, don't bother me, I don't have an MBA and I write about marketing, and the cost is truly minimal. Later I overheard him talking to my older one, saying with great pride, you can do anything you set your mind to, young lady, Mommy is going for an MBA after all these years.
Before "The Accountant" started playing at the movie theater, they ran the preview for Will Smith's upcoming movie, "Collateral Beauty." Will Smith is one of those people who can make a very bad-sounding movie actually work and in this film he is grief-stricken, writing letters to Time, Love and Death. Keira Knightley plays love and she says something to him like, "Love is all there is in this world, and when you understand that maybe you can start living again."
We undervalue communication so much. We can't admit how important it is, how badly we need it, how we feel starved without connection -- to ourselves, to each other, and yes, to some sort of meaning over and above all of that.
I think about those times when I've flown into a rage and regret them. My mother used to say, You have a tongue like a sword.
Wars are won and lost not by the sword, but through genuine love and its absence.
All opinions my own. Photo by Simone.com via Flickr (Creative Commons)