I'm With Stupid


The following conversation never occurred, but it could have.

There we were at the conference table. Yet another meeting. Close to sundown, as the days are growing short.

"I have to tell you something," I said.


"I don't think I'm as smart as I need to be. And it bothers me."

"What? What do you mean?"

"I mean, I can't keep up. Harvard, MIT, interns who know five languages and produce videos on their iPhones. Coders for America."

She looked at me as if to say, I can't believe you're saying this. And then she started laughing.

But I felt like Norma Rae. I had to speak out.

"What the hell is all this new technology, anyway? Every minute a new thing to learn."

A surge of blood flew up my face. My fists clenched instinctively. I would stand up against the constant invasion of new, new, new!

"Snapchatter, Github, APIs. What the hell is an API?"

Up, up, up and away.

"First they said Drupal 6, then it was Drupal 7, and now it's Drupal 8 - beta."

"Totally, totally," she said reassuringly, eyeing the door. A full scale rant.

"And to make matters worse, my teenager codes mobile apps in her sleep."

She stood up, ending the meeting. "Don't worry about it, my dear."

"Why? Why shouldn't I worry about it, tell me?"

She looked through the shutters and into the waning light.

"We're all in the same boat. You'll feel better tomorrow."

* All opinions my own.